Year In Review - 2013 Edition

According to the stats the behind-the-scenes blog hosts keep, my most popular post is this one, my 2012 Year in Review. By a HUGE margin. The next most-popular post is not even close. I mean, if this was the Oscars, my 2012 Year In Review posting would already be back at the hotel, snorting coke off a hooker’s ass, having swept the board at the awards show and attended all the cool after-parties, while the next post would still be waiting in line to buy a ticket to the movie. Yeah, not even close. I have no idea why it is so popular. And it sure puts a hell of a lot of pressure on me for this year’s edition. But I have to try, so here goes:

• No sex this year.
• Lost three pounds (only another 97 to go!)!
• Got a letter published in Entertainment Weekly (see the December 13 issue).
• Um, wait, there’s got to be other stuff…

Nope, not really. It was truly a boring year. In a way, that is good because it means nothing truly bad happened, but it can’t be much fun for you, my loyal readers (all five of you and those of you who were directed here by Google when you were just trying to find information on tractors made by Massey Ferguson (MF, get it?)). I mean, I could go and check my Excel spreadsheet to see how many pedicures I got or how much I spent at the post office and Target, because those stats were on last year’s post and we all know how popular that was, but really, that would just emphasize how dull my 2013 has been.

Although there are approximately 15 hours left in 2013 so who knows, I might have more to report next week. Unlikely considering my plans for the rest of today consist of going home and getting blind drunk and watching Anderson Cooper ring in another new year without me in his life.

Maybe the 2014 Year In Review post will be better, because my year will be more exciting. But only exciting, positive stuff. And I hope your 2014 is the same, dear friends and tractor lovers alike!