I owe you posts. Some you are probably expecting (Nos.1, 2, and 8 in the list below); some, you are not (uh… the rest of them). I don’t really have a good pre-No.2 excuse as to why you have not gotten No.1 but it is because of No.2 that you have not gotten Nos.2 through 12 (No.13 hasn’t happened yet). I don’t know if it makes any sense but when those of you who do not know about No.2 read that post (whenever it gets published) you’ll realize why.
So, coming to this blog… at some point:
1.
The December 6 shooting.
2.
Sammy died.
3.
The reasons behind a huge upswing in readers
of this blog.
4.
My plan to quit drinking on Tuesday and
Wednesday nights so I can watch TV and actually remember what I watched the
next day.
5.
My plan to start incorporating the phrase “I
fart in your general direction” more into my life, both verbally and in
writing.
6.
My need for new excuses as to why I cannot
travel to visit friends and family now that my main excuse (i.e., Sammy) is no
longer viable.
7.
Why it was not Sammy keeping me from having a
boyfriend (seriously – when I made the announcement on Facebook concerning
No.2, someone remarked “Well, now at least you can get a boyfriend.” Oy vey.).
8.
American Idol.
9.
How I didn’t realize just how much No.2 had affected
me until I started this blog post.
10. How I really want to make a comment on
Facebook about a former friend’s wife’s teeth but only because something he
said to me one time would be on a post about the worst insults I have ever
received but what is stopping me is my pledge to not post anything negative.
Plus, it really isn’t nice to insult someone’s looks (which, as I am sure you can
surmise, is a very big part of the Worst Insults I have Ever Received post,
should I ever get around to writing it).
11. A post about the worst insults I have ever
received.
12. How a meme about a bottle of champagne caused
an existential crisis.
13. The annual Feast of the Virgin post
(technically, I could still get this one in on time because this year’s
bacchanal is scheduled for June 8 but it is not looking good that I’ll get it
in any time soon (see Ibid.)).
